What Now?

As many of you know by now I’m a United Methodist pastor. I’m actually a Licensed Local Pastor which means my connection is a little different than ordained clergy (elders) but for the most part, it is the same responsibility. Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock you probably know what is going on in our denomination right now. A big meeting was held to try and determine our church’s stance on the issue of ordaining LGBTQ clergy and allowing current clergy to perform same-sex weddings. If you’re here to find out what my stance is, you’re going to be disappointed. For the most part, I’m trying to keep my overall opinion off of social media, but I’d be happy to indulge in a personal discussion.

The reason I write though is this has been weighing very heavily on me. It’s weighing heavily because I have friends who are hurt and affected by all of this. Not just the decision that came down, but all of the stuff that happened before, during and after this conference. This got ugly. I actually saw posts in both a United Methodist clergy group and a Worship Leaders’ group I’m involved in on Facebook, that were so very unbecoming of people who are supposed to be following Jesus. To make matters worse, these are people who are called to ministry as pastors and leaders. The hatred, vitriol, namecalling, finger pointing, foul language and other behaviors that I saw were uncalled for, unnecessary, unChristlike and unworthy of the calling we have.

The question we must ask ourselves is, “Where do we go from here?”. I’ve heard a lot of talk about people doing their own thing or bailing on the denomination altogether. I’ve heard others say they’ll stay and fight for what they believe in. The talk around my own church is to recognize that people are hurting and to understand that the bigger picture is nothing has really changed for us and that we must continue to be the Church. It’s actually pretty good advice.

The question that comes out of all of this is, when did anyone get an inside track on the truth? People who are biblical literalists still ignore some things. People on the other side do the same thing. Everyone agrees that there are things in the Bible that are culturally relevant to that specific time period and not today. The question comes, where do we draw that line? Over history, we’ve seen many churches and denominations change their stance on certain societal issues. We’ve also seen some stick to their beliefs and choose not to change. So who is right or wrong?

What we have to ask is does it matter? Does it matter who is right and who is wrong? Is someone right and someone wrong and can we really know? When Jesus was pressed about what the greatest of the 10 Commandments was (remember, it was a trap) he answered: ³⁷ Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’^[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’^[b] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” – Matthew 22:37-40

What we have to ask ourselves is this, is it important to be right? Should we be worried about being wrong? Or should we just do what Jesus said and love God and love our neighbors? I think this is where we are ALL messing up on this. We’re not treating the people we disagree with as Jesus would have us treat them. Jesus admonishes us in Matthew 5:43-48 to love our enemies because it’s easy to love people who are just like us. That means people who look like us, dress like us, talk like us, think like us, believe like us, love like us. See where I’m going with this?

In the midst of all of this, not just this issue in the United Methodist Church but even in American politics, we’ve forgotten to love our enemies. Can you imagine how all of this would be different if we allowed this to happen? If we actually, and I mean actually, engaged in dialogue, not to make sure our point is heard, but to hear the point of the other? To actually work, and I do mean work, towards peace and understanding?

I’m not sure where we’ll go from here. A lot of damage has been done. People have been hurt and continue to be hurt by post-conference rhetoric. I’m not sure what’s going to happen but I do know one thing: God is still God. God can and will work in the midst of this. My prayer today is that the church can continue its mission to make disciples, to love all people (even our enemies) the way Jesus did and does, and that we would listen to God’s Spirit, wherever it may lead…even if it’s across the aisle.

Does God really hate?

 I originally begin writing this post a few weeks ago and decided to go back and finish it for publication. I’ll probably be doing this for a few more “drafts” that never got posted that were relevant at the time.

I originally left the UMC in 2004 after having served for over ten years at various churches in Indiana. I left during a time when I saw the UMC becoming what I considered to be more liberal in their stance on homosexuality. I found myself moving to the the Church of the Nazarene, a much more conservative denomination but still in line with my Wesleyan views. Fast forward eight years and I now find myself interviewing at two UMCs in the Philadelphia region (I actually didn’t get either position but will be starting this Sunday part-time at a UMC). Ironically enough this week my Facebook feed has be alive with my friends sharing the most recent news from the United Methodist Church’s General Conference and the vote to change the wording in the Book of Discipline regarding homosexuality. Ultimately the proposal to change the wording was defeated by a margin of 54% to 46%.

As I find myself looking to reenter the denomination I left, a lot has changed for me. I can truly say I no longer feel the way I used to. Now before seeking to praise or ridicule me, please know that I’m not quite sure where I stand on the issue. The fact is I have friends who are LGBT but I also find myself with a deep-seeded conservative and homophobic theology. It is no doubt that this theology stems from growing up Baptist in the buckle of the Bible belt. However, it is also due to my conservative upbringing that I find myself looking at my own life and the mistakes I’ve made which then causes me to take a step back and try to look at things a little differently.

I believe the problem is the church too often focuses it’s attention on certain topics that according to Scripture would be considered a sin while ignoring others that would also be deemed as such. We hear a lot of talk about adultery, premarital sex, divorce, gambling and drinking, but what about greed, slander, gossip, gluttony, lying and the like?

After my divorce and everything that happened, I found myself in a similar situation to my LGBT friends, on the outside of the church walls and not feeling very welcome to come  inside. I struggled because I longed to be close to God, yet I felt unworthy of his love and forgiveness. As someone who has made my fair share of mistakes, I find it very difficult to sit in judgment of anyone. This doesn’t mean I don’t believe or that there are things that I hold to be true. What it means is that I believe what Jesus says in Mark 12:30-31 that we are to: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

One of the biggest things that has changed for me, and where I believe the church struggles, is actually getting to know the people who are often the subject of their ridicule and judgment. It’s easy to condemn someone until you’ve actually been where they are or at the very least gotten to know them. But when we spend most of our time with other Christians and don’t take the time to know someone or simply write them off because we disagree with something in their life, we are truly missing our chance to both teach and learn.

If Jesus were like most Christians he would have spent his time in the synagogue hanging out with the pharisees. As we know this definitely wasn’t the case. Instead Jesus spent his time with the people society had forgotten and written off.

It’s time for us to walk out the front doors of our churches and put down our stones.